Well, holy bumblasting badgers that was – weird. Stupid. Intentionally foul and lovingly crafted.
…lets just get into this.
DRINK OF CHOICE
I was going to go with MD 20/20 given the subject matter…but I just couldn’t disgrace my already shamed and degraded liver that much, so I opted for bottom shelf whisky served in a paper bag.
Also it was suggested that I do a shot everytime someone dies or the main dude takes a shit. Can I just be the first to say, after 35 such instances, don’t you fucking dare. Papa B has the cured liver of the most seasoned Irishman, but even he had to bow out. (that’s me. I’m speaking in third person cuz i’m fucking HAMMERED). Instead, I suggest a modest sip from a good beverage.
And yes, folks, I counted.
This is going to be a relatively brief section. Its a year in the life of a bum that kills and shits and pukes all over the fuckin place. Its like, oh, hey, its been 90 seconds, better projectile shit all over this bag.
Though there was one moment that reminded me of this:
Truly, generally, a supremely impressive amount of bodily fluids. For fluffing fucks sake I watched a solid 5 minute scene of dude slowly building up a pile of puke and bile before he slowly picked it back up and pushed it back into his mouth. Also, ‘cock fountain’. Remember that.
I was getting a bit…bored, oddly enough, around the 1 hr mark, until homie goes off the deep end and spikes a baby like a football in the Touchdown zone. From there on in its a cavalcade of fuckery as our main man goes on a dick dismembering, throat thrusting, stomach stabbing spree of truly epic proportions. Until, of course, he meets the woman of his dreams. and then he REALLY goes crazy. If you can even comprehend that.
(no really, I wanted to just put that. considering the dialog and the content…i’m not exactly wrong.)
Lets get real though. This is a movie. I think.
Its a movie about …some shit. Mostly shit. Also some puke, a bum, a decent shiv, a healthy dose of insanity and a tiny dash of social commentary. And I won’t lie – I liked it. I can’t tell you its a good movie. I can’t tell you its got a plot. BUT – I can tell you this:
Its – literally – pants shitting unique. Its one of a kind, and its a shitty fuck fest of a ride. And I wholly recommend it.
TL;DR 7/10 Homeless homie enjoys his own fluids and others. Also, theres a movie.
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Categories: Thirsty Thursday