So we decided to go retro tonight. What better way than exemplifying the fact that horror film makers ran out of ideas in 1987 and thought ‘fuck it, slugs’.
Look. You think this is a game???
Ok so, synopsis
1. Slugs, of an otherworldly nature, invade a decade rife with Saxophones
2. Hairstyles evolve and consume the skulls of their wearers
3. Victory against our recent slug overlords
Synopsis sinfully sacrificed
Ok, the rest of this review will largely be random musings given lack of substance (that isn’t ooey gooey fresh and chewy) ((thats slug alliteration)) (((illliteration? CUZ THESE RHYMES IS ILL SON)))
Quotas de la noche\
Romulus: Hold up, plot key words on IMDB… “slug, eye gouging, skeleton, teen couple eating, and male nudity.” But I can see more, actually.
Bacchus: But do you really need to? Can we revisit teen couple eating?
Romulus: Standby. Top movies involving ‘teen couple eating; 1. Blob, 2. Piranha, 3. creepshow, 4. slugs, 5. bats
Bacchus: WE ARE WATCHING BATS NEXT
Bacchus: OH NOOOOO THE CABBAGE IS MOVING
Bacchus: Is that baileys?? *you ever drink baileys out of an old shoe?*
COULD YA LOVE MEH
SO – gas leaks are bad, no one thought of salt, and benign garden pests are massive threats to homeland security.
We should invade.
BUT WAIT. The twats can BITE!
HEY THERE WAS NO WARNING ABOUT ANIMAL CRUELTY THAT MAN JUST KILLED THAT SLUG
I mean how lazy do you have to be for slugs to be able to kill you
Categories: If you're already drunk